When you have an anxiety disorder, the people around you become either petrified to say ANYTHING at all to you, for fear of you "going off your rocker", or they say very unhelpful things like "just get over it", and "don't panic". If "don't panic" worked for panic attacks, there would be no panic attacks to "not panic" about.
People mean well, but they come up with the strangest things sometimes. "I conquered my fears by just doing the things I was afraid of". How nice for you. I hadn't thought of that AT ALL. *sarcasm font*
When one has anxiety or agoraphobia, or social phobia, the best thing to do is just be patient, and if you can't be the patient friend, then don't be the friend. If you cannot accept a person with all their scars and flaws, inside and out, then do both of you a favor, and don't be around them.
I was told by a former friend "I accept everything about you, warts and all". I have no warts by the way, just thought I'd get that in there. Not that warts are a bad thing, but I don't happen to have any. Anyhow, I was relieved, yet cynical at the same time. I had been through this before. Of course the friend meant well, but they just couldn't handle the fact that they couldn't fix me, or my problems with just a few words of encouragement.
Lately I have become content. I am not content to be a hermit - definitely not. However, I am content in my life. I have waited for years for things to be just perfect so I could be happy and content. Now I realize I don't need all of that stuff and nonsense to be happy. I am happy now, with what I have, who I have around me and the fact that I am working through a few things. I will freely admit that my anxiety and social phobia and occasional agoraphobia are self-imposed. I CAN leave the apartment, and I CAN talk to anyone I wish to, and I CAN go to an event filled with folks. The problem is the anticipation part. The what ifs in life can kill you. They can stall you until you've reached 45 years of age and feel as if you haven't DONE a damned thing with your life because of fear.
So here I go, wandering into the fear zone alone, and I started a blog. Actually this is the third or fourth blog I've started, but I cared if people read it or not. Now I could care less. If it's read, that is pleasing. If it's not read, then it's not read.
So all you agoraphobics, social anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder folks, take a page from my book (oh yes, I AM working on a book) and take those baby steps. Baby steps ARE considered successes, and don't discount them. Tell the world if you want, put it on posters, put it on billboards that you were able to "......." for the first time with very little anxiety. Yes I am afraid to say that the "just do the things you are afraid of" people are right, but you don't have to jump in headfirst either. Each little step gets you closer to comfort and freedom, and fulfilling your dreams.
I do hope you'll check back to see how my journey of baby steps goes, and to see how my mind works (be forewarned, I think about some really strange things).
Ta :)
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